Voloyda sent me this picture of David's family on Facebook today.
V:
I found this picture for you. His sons
are totally hot. You should go after one
of them.
O:
Because that wouldn’t be weird at all.
V:
You go after one of them to get close to David, it would be perfect.
O:
Maybe if I had completely lost all touch with reality that might seem like a
good idea. But tenuous as my grip may
be, I’m not that far gone. So I’m inclined
to say no.
V:
You’re not even willing to try.
O:
Why would I? I’m already in a
relationship. And even if I wasn’t David’s
sons would be just about the last people I would go after.
V:
Why? They could be totally awesome.
O:
I’m sure they are. But I’m not
interested.
V:
But it could work. You get with one of
the boys and after a while he would eventually introduce you to his
parents. Then you could make your move
on David.
O:
Out of the many holes in that plan the one that immediately springs to mind is
the fact that I don’t know where his children are. Nor do I wish to.
V:
I know where they are
O: Of course you do. Well even with that problem resolved I still see many holes. The first of which is assuming I could get one of them to go out with me to begin with. I would hazard a guess that David has told his children that someone was stalking him. If someone my children’s age was stalking me the first thing I would tell my kids would be: do not under any circumstances go out with this person. It also assumes that we would progress far enough into the relationship that he would introduce me to his parents. And lastly it implies that David and his wife would be content with their son dating me. I don’t ever see that happening. Maybe something like I’m introduced and David’s wife punches me in the face and they toss me out, but I don’t see them ever being okay with it.
V: You don’t know that would happen. Everything could work out fine.
O: Okay so let’s say everything goes well up until this point and I’ve not been beaten down or anything. I’m supposed to convince David that he should cheat on his wife with me, his son’s girlfriend? I don’t see any ethical problem there.
V: It was just a suggestion.
O: Thanks but no thanks. I’m happy with the person I’m with.
V: Well if you’re not going to go after one of them, I might. His children are very hot.
O: You don’t even know if they’re gay.
V: Doesn’t hurt to ask.
O: Well good luck
with that. And keep me out of it. I don’t want to be a part of this when it
blows up in your face.O: Of course you do. Well even with that problem resolved I still see many holes. The first of which is assuming I could get one of them to go out with me to begin with. I would hazard a guess that David has told his children that someone was stalking him. If someone my children’s age was stalking me the first thing I would tell my kids would be: do not under any circumstances go out with this person. It also assumes that we would progress far enough into the relationship that he would introduce me to his parents. And lastly it implies that David and his wife would be content with their son dating me. I don’t ever see that happening. Maybe something like I’m introduced and David’s wife punches me in the face and they toss me out, but I don’t see them ever being okay with it.
V: You don’t know that would happen. Everything could work out fine.
O: Okay so let’s say everything goes well up until this point and I’ve not been beaten down or anything. I’m supposed to convince David that he should cheat on his wife with me, his son’s girlfriend? I don’t see any ethical problem there.
V: It was just a suggestion.
O: Thanks but no thanks. I’m happy with the person I’m with.
V: Well if you’re not going to go after one of them, I might. His children are very hot.
O: You don’t even know if they’re gay.
V: Doesn’t hurt to ask.
I have no idea what Voloyda is thinking. He's been trying to convince me to get back together with him since we broke up and now he wants me to hook up with one of David's children. Because that is totally who I want to go out with, the son of the man who has a restraining order against me. I see no way that could end badly. What the fuck man?
