30 Days of Autism Acceptance: Day 24

Talk about the stereotypes and misconceptions that neurotypicals and allistics have. What stereotypes have you heard about autism? How do you respond to people who have incorrect stereotypes about autism? What kind of things should people not say to autistic people? What’s something you wish NTs/allistics knew about autism?

Some of the most common stereotypes I’ve come across are the following and to be clear all of them are complete rubbish: 

• ‘Autistic people are like children/have the mind of a child.’ A lot of us go to university, get married, work, have children of our own. That doesn’t sound like a child. And even for the people that can’t manage to do those things it doesn’t make them a child, it means they may require a bit more support but they are not children. There is no one way to be an adult. You don’t get to dismiss someone’s adulthood because they do things differently than how you would like. 
• ‘Autistic people are all intellectually disabled.’ Most autistic people have average to above average intelligence and even for those that don’t it’s not a reason to treat them like a child. Intelligence is not the most important thing in the world. 
• ‘Autism is something that only effects children/something we grow out of.’ You can’t grow out of a neurotype. Autistic people are born autistic and we will die autistic, it’s not something we grow out of. 
• ‘Autistic people don’t have emotions.’ We may not be able to show them as much but we definitely have emotions. Just because they don’t always present in the typical way doesn’t mean they are not there.
• ‘Vaccines cause autism.’ This is by far one of the most idiotic things I’ve ever heard and despite all the evidence to the contrary some people really believe this. There is no arguing with these people.

Though it can depend on the situation I usually tell people, with documentation and examples, as to why their opinion is a load of crap (I word it a bit more tactfully). I’m not really sure how well this approach works. Most people seem unwilling to change their opinion even when presented with factual information to the contrary. Though a couple weeks ago I did manage to successfully convince someone that autism speaks is awful so I guess it works sometimes.

What not to say to autistic people has already been partially covered on day 12 in the discussion about ableism so I don’t have too much to add. Along with the above statements you shouldn’t say anything about how we don’t seem/look autistic, don’t say we’re high functioning, don’t compare us to your young child, don’t ask us to act more neurotypical.

Something allistics/NTs need to remember is that autism is a huge spectrum with lots of variation in how it presents, no two autistic people are the same. We have a saying: If you’ve met one autistic person, you’ve met one autistic person. We are all different. So don’t go comparing us to anyone else, I can assure we are not all the same.